Alan Davies Opens Up: Brother Cut Ties After Father’s Abuse Was Exposed
In a heartfelt and deeply personal revelation, comedian Alan Davies has shared how his decision to report his father’s sexual abuse led to a painful estrangement from his older brother.
The 59-year-old star, known for his wit and presence on television, disclosed that the trauma he endured between the ages of eight and 13 left deep scars.
The abuse began after his mother’s death from leukaemia when he was just six. Despite the support networks one might expect, Alan confessed that his family’s instinct was to protect the perpetrator rather than the victim.
Alan Davies on Trauma: How Childhood Abuse Shaped His Life and Comedyhttps://t.co/uCWwxO9r1r
Alan Davies reveals he was sexually abused by his father aged 8–13 and that reporting him cost him family ties, with his brother cutting contact.
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“If the abuse occurred within a family, as it usually does, the instinct to withhold feels right, because families don’t usually support the victim,” Alan told The Telegraph.
His older brother, he revealed, “stopped speaking to me after I had dad arrested. He stopped sending birthday cards to my kids. I still have some contact with my sister, I see her son.”
Alan added with raw honesty, “They would have still preferred I didn’t say anything at all. But this is bigger than my family. You can’t not shine a light on it, just because you find it ‘a bit awkward’.”
Alan’s journey wasn’t straightforward. For years, he battled with anger and alcohol dependency.
It wasn’t until eight years ago, after entering help from a therapist, that he eventually took the step to report his father to the authorities.
Despite his courage, justice was fugitive. His father, also in his eighties and suffering from madness while abiding in a care home, was supposed to be unfit to stand trial. Still, Alan’s resoluteness remained strong.
Opening up about why he shared his ordeal in his memoir Just Ignore Him, Alan spoke on Lorraine with Cat Deeley.
“It took me a long time to kind of find a forum, as it were, to talk about the more difficult things in my childhood.
I haven’t been able to do it in stand-up comedy, I’ve done it in this book.”
The response, he revealed, was more profound than he anticipated.
“Several people, people I know, one or two quite well-known people, they’ve come to me and they’ve said ‘I’ve read your book and a similar thing happened to me’ or ‘similar things happened to me’ and then we’ve had a conversation about it as normal as talking about having a cup of tea.”
Alan’s decision to speak out reflects a wider cultural issue, familial abuse, and the silence surrounding it. By breaking that silence, he’s not only defying his history but offering a platform for others.
His story is a stark reminder that abuse within families, however uncomfortable to admit, must be addressed openly and compassionately.
For the most part, Alan’s frippery could pave the way to mending exchanges and maybe, a little further light in the dark corners of silence.
